A little boy walks in on his dad masturbating. Never having seen anyone do this, he asks, “Daddy, what are you doing?” His dad replies, “Don’t worry, son, you’ll be doing it soon enough!” “Really? Why’s …
I really hate how politically correct the world is getting. I cant even say “black paint” anymore. I have to say, “Hey Jamal, can you please paint that wall for me?”
So random, I ran into Hitler the other day. I was surprised to see him, and asked him what he was up to? He said, “This time I am going to kill 6 million Jews, …
What’s the difference between Paul Walker and a computer? I give a fuck when my computer crashes. My Grandpa said, “Your generation relies too much on technology!” I replied, “No, your generation relies too much …
A fly is hovering 6 inches above a stream, and a fish swimming below thinks to itself, “If that fly drops 6 inches, I can swim up and eat it.” A nearby bear thinks to itself, “If that fly drops …
I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering me; Her gorgeous younger …
Three third grade students, a white kid, a Chinese kid, and a black kid, are hanging out on the playground when they decide to have a dick measuring contest. The white kid whips out his little penis. …
A little boy wakes up in the middle of the night, wanders into his parents bedroom and sees them having sex. The little boy, immediately traumatized, runs out of the room crying. “You should go check …
A Romanian, a Jew and a Somali are all sitting underneath a tree. A caterpillar falls onto the Romanian’s shoulder. The Romanian flicks the caterpillar at the Jew, the Jew flicks the caterpillar at the Somali, and the …
Two homeless men are standing around bragging about their day. The first hobo says, “Today I found $20 dollars, and was able to buy a nice hot meal. It was my luckiest day ever!” The second …
A married couple down on their luck decides to make a few extra dollars by reluctantly having the wife work the corner. After the first day the husband picks her up and asks, “How did you …